I WISH EVERYONE KNEW THIS.
As I sat in the bus shuttling down to my house yesterday evening, the thought of myself, people and life generally gained a grip of my mind. A truth hit me. No one has it all! As is normal with every thinker, when these kinds of revelation bug you, your brain in a jiffy begins to process it's validity and authenticity. Then I beamed the brain light on myself; I discovered that there had always been things I wished I could change about myself. I once queried God why he didn't make me taller, why my junior ones had to be taller than me. I once wished I could play football, could play games, could whistle with my tongue, wished I was good at math, hated that there was this mark on my face which was a primitive remedy for my childhood convulsion and probably hated that i had an eye bag. I sometimes even wish i was more handsome than I am now.
Please bear with me for my self indulgence. Then I thought about important people celebrated for their works and yet didn't have everything.
For example, Genevieve Nnaji is short and single, TD Jakes is not handsome, Ini Edo doesn't have a kid, Rihanna doesn't have true love, Cobhams Asuquo is blind, Nike Oshinowo is a divorcee & single parent, Kim Kardashian can't live without media attention, Tonto Dikeh is lonely, Yvonne Nelson has low self esteem, Beyonce lives in fear of ever breaking her legs, and the list goes on & on even though I know this is a debatable line of thought.
When I thought about myself and my seeming shortcomings, I discovered that I was now living beyond them. If you noticed, I used the past tenses, "wished" and "hated" when I was talking about myself because that's not the case anymore. I have learnt that if you bury your head in shame, no one will see your pretty eyes, nose, lips or neck. What you call yourself is what others will call you. Unlike some who are blessed with a natural beauty, height, impeccable diction, eloquence & charisma by way of environmental influence and early tutoring, folks like us had to train, feel it then become it ourselves. I remember in 2009 when I created my Club's Facebook group page(RARE BREEDS CLUB), I was literally struggling to hit the 100 membership target I had set for myself in 3months. When I failed, I became so discouraged that I let the group have a good sleep for a year & 5 months. Then at the second half of 2011, I picked up courage and began posting inspiring thoughts, began adding folks whether they liked it or not(and some left). But I was too motivated to give up. Then i learnt to spice up my seeming inflexible posts with a tint of "Live & Laff" jokes, celebrity gist and interactive discussions with prize gifts. Like a whirlwind, the membership requests began to flood in. It became so much so that if I didn't have access to the internet with my laptop, I worried that over 50 member requests would be pending in a week's time.
Today, we are more than 2,500 with half of the members joining willfully and businesses advertising therein. Permit me to talk about Pastor Matthew Ashimolowo, a former muslim boy who lived in the barracks with his family in Kaduna and who remembers that his irresponsible father couldn't even bring home his monthly salary.
This same man couldn't go to school except for a bible seminary but who has today become a voice so influential on the international scene, invests heavily on media outreach, has written over 50 books, teaches financial principles like he went to Harvard Business School and whose church now owns a 24 acres Prayer City facility in Kent, England valued at 42 million pounds. Or what do I say about Bishop Jakes who grew from a simple grave digger to the most respected preacher in America. Someone once asked me, "why do so many people love you?" I simply told him that he would have to pay me so i could divulge such secret..Lol!
What he didn't know was that there was no single answer to such query. In fact, it was a culmination of time, processes and consistency in being my own brand. EVERYONE HAS SOMETHING UNIQUE ABOUT THEM. Someone rightly said that all men have gifts, only that some unwrap theirs before others. You may look at yourself and see only an endless list of inadequacies and in competencies and lose sight of your great potentials. But i tell you: If people say you are not fine, begin to take care of yourself more; have regular cute haircuts and makeover/makeup. If they say you have body odour, get antiseptic soaps and good fragrances & smell sweet. If they suggest your mouth smells, brush morning & night with emphasis on your tongue & take mints for fresh breath intermittently. If they say you don't speak good grammar and are not well read, then borrow books, get an English textbook, write small exercises & give any good teacher to grade you. If you desire to BE MORE, you 've got to be ready to DO MORE. As a lady, if you do not know how to walk queenly, get a stiletto & train yourself (Beyonce dances in plenty of 'em). You don't have to win everyone's appeal; recognize that there can only be one YOU and keep loving & celebrating yourself. Don't let those whom you think are better than you intimidate you. There's a King and Queen in You- Discover & Deploy it! Be loving, gentle, sweet, beautiful, courteous, charismatic. Learn to build relationships; you miss out on certain opportunities when you keep waiting for people to say "hi" to you first. Learn to be outgoing. Shun religious laziness; don't abdicate your responsibility to God. YOU ARE THE MOLDER OF YOUR DESTINY NOT GOD! God has given you everything you 'll ever need: first he gave you a family to love & support you, a brain to process ideas and a mind to think through & arrive at solutions, an education to enlighten you and church to guide you right. What else do you need? It was Dennis Waitley who said that "It's not what you are that holds you back, it's what you think you are not." I have discovered my calling(building leaders and inspiring lives) and have vowed to keep maximizing it whether i feel like it or not. Discover what makes you tick, give your all to it, be consistent with it and like Linda Ikeji who started blogging without much hype but has now become the celebrities' and people's favorite info blogger and social promoter, you will become an influential authority in your chosen field.
Toast to your Success in Life
RARE GENTLE is a lawyer, a motivational speaker and the president of RARE GENTLE FAN CLUB. He is currently pursing his MBA degree in University of Northampton UK. You can follow him on Twitter on gentle_eyisi for more inspiring tips
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